I am constantly amazed at how much the Lord speaks to me everyday, and often I do not even hear Him, or pay any attention to what He is saying. Too often I am too busy to pay any attention to the details, and miss out on a great lesson.
The other day I was reading a book and came across this quote by Mother Theresa:
"I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love."
The book I was reading did not use this exact quote, it was used by a character telling his wife how much he loved her. However, it has stuck with me. I find it beautiful, the way God created love, because to a point I do believe this. However, I also do NOT believe this to be entirely accurate.
When I was in Bible school (FIRE School of Ministry), I did a paper on the "love" passage in Corinthians. 1 Corinthians 13: 1-13 to be specific. I wanted to know the exact meaning of these words, the exact Greek word used and the context with which it meant. I will not go into all that, mostly because I do not remember the specifics. I wrote it about 10 years ago. However, I came away with one Greek word that I feel sums the passage up well:
Agape
Agape is the Greek word for the kind of love for other people that is completely selfLESS. The kind of love Jesus has for us. If we read through the life of Jesus, we see His love for those around us, and His love for us. He did not live an easy life, he was wanted dead by many people, though he was loved by many as well. He was betrayed by a close friend, and later, during His Crucifixion, He was betrayed by all his disciples save one. He even told Peter that he would betray Him not once, but three times. The fact of the matter is that Jesus was human. He had human emotions, and I believe He felt the pain of those betrayals. I believe this hurt His heart, just like betrayal hurts us. However, Jesus continued to love, He did not become bitter and angry, because He knew the weakness of his dear friends.
See, Jesus also knows our weaknesses. He knows we are weak people, He knows we will mess up, sin both willfully, and unintentionally.
I am guilty of allowing myself to wallow in my weakness and be convinced that in order for Jesus to love me again, in order for Him to want to continue a relationship with me, I must beg His forgiveness, and spend a certain amount of time wallowing in my guilt. The problem is that wallowing in my guild only keeps me away from the Lord longer, because the longer I wallow the worse I feel, and the more unworthy I feel to enter into His presence. Wallowing is Satan's way of keeping us away from the Lord, there is no honor in wallowing.
Jesus has already made the sacrifice for us, and He has already forgiven us. We just need to repent, ask for forgiveness and move on.
He is not a human with whom we have to make up for our mistakes
Many times in order for people to get forgiveness from others is to perform some sort of penance. We have to do something in order to get their forgiveness. If I understand correctly the Catholic faith requires Hail Mary's or "Thy Fathers", something like that to be done so many times in order for someone to gain forgiveness from the Lord for a sin.
God does NOT require works.
Faith is required.
Jesus already paid the sacrifice.
Back to my point about that quote. When I love fully, I do love more. However, there is always going to be pain involved, because people are always going to intentionally or unintentionally hurt me. But God has called us to love those who hurt us, love those who live different lifestyles than us, love those who disagree with us.
LOVE
God has called me to love no matter the cost. It is hard, and more often than not I don't want to do it...but I pray frequently that God would change my heart, transform my life so that I would love like He does.
Because in the end, it is Agape love that will change the world.
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